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“Reasons You’re A Bad Road Team”
- Staying at a Holiday Inn Express doesn't make you smart enough to hit the freakin' cut off man
- Unfamiliar mascots scare you
- Home team bats last against your bullpen — 'nuff said
- Somebody keeps slipping you a mickey with the hotel mint
- Stomach always woozy in Anaheim from riding “Splash Mountain” all day
- Motel 6 turned the lights off on you
- Without the Shaky Lemonade Guy, there's nothing to break the tension
- Much more comfortable being booed by fans at home
- Get paid the same even if you don't play the bottom of the ninth
- The placement of the lights in relation to home plate....oh, heck, you just suck
