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“Signs Your JumboTron Has Gone Haywire”
- It's showing highlights of a Tigers win
- “I don't care how great a song it is, 'Thank God I'm a Country Boy' nonstop for six innings is too much”
- Orson Welles has created a scene of sheer pandemonium at Uncle Teddy's Pretzels
- Have to keep sending Ernie Tyler up to whack it on the side.
- It's so grainy I can't tell if it's Al-Jazeera or Jerry Hairston with a towel on his head
- “Who the heck is 'Moonlight' Graham?”
- Won't stop blinking “12:00 AM”
- “Is that Sid Fernandez on a trampoline?”
- Fans have never heard the Bird mascot speak, let alone curse a blue streak
- “That Esskay hot dog seems to be growing!”
