“Ways Baseball Will Be Different In Washington, DC”

10. Word of a IRS audit is enough to shake up a visiting starting pitcher before the game
9. Since you’re in DC, your All-Star votes don’t technically count
8. Have a bad inning? Declare war.
7. Billions of dollars in school subsidies now shifted to prevention of pulled groins
6. Endless filibustering with umpires
5. New exhibit at The National Archives: Protective Cups Through History
4. “Is that Don Zimmer on the $100 bill?”
3. Scout’s radar gun cleverly concealed in a carnation
2. Dick Cheney’s always hiding in the trainer’s room
1. Every time you win a stinkin’ game, you have to show up at a White House ceremony