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“Orioles Things To Do In September”
- Scour both leagues for aged, overpriced players
- Fix all the stuff Albert broke
- Practice depostion testimony for the Bird's trial
- Poke around Frank Wren's office for furniture you might like
- Pack Brady's sideburns in dry ice
- Get the Shaky Lemonade Guy back on his nerve medication
- Don't let Jesse Orosco fall asleep in the vat of Ben-Gay again
- Put Ernie Tyler into winter storage
- Have some more of them Doug Johns brownies
- Plan the surprise retirement party for Ray Miller
